Google Voice Mail Transcriptions totally suck.
Actual case studies.
My friend, let’s call him Chris Wininger, called my Google Voice phone number and left me a voice mail message. Here is a screenshot showing Google Voice’s transcription of the Chris Wininger voice mail message…
- Here’s what Google thinks The Chris Wininger was saying in the message…
And I quote…
Hey Mona, cos Perot’s you or home or removal.
But.
So, Hi baby, it’s gonna be in.
ha ha ha.
And here’s what the actual voice mail message actually said, in actuality.
One completely normal — and important — voice mail message. Destroyed by Google’s terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad Voice mail transcription service.
Oh. I circled that Transcript Useful? thing because it happens to be the only thing useful about the entire Google Voice Transcription service. Pretty clever joke, wouldn’t you say? ‘Swhy I circled it.
Wait a minute… You have to say something nice about Google or they will turn you into digital dust!
Okay, so other than the wretchedly flawed transcription service, Google Voice is totally awesome. And as a side note, the Google Translate service just keeps getting better and better. Now it translates in real time as you type from one language into whatever language you select.
Interesting side note #2, Facebook has integrated Bing’s language translation functionality throughout the site’s commenting and messaging systems. So now users can finally tell just exactly what the hell people are talking about in all those other crazy languages.
They straight up publicly dissed you, Google. You gonna take that?
Which brings us back to… D’oh!
This horrible transcription service you’re running. Yes, it is really cool that I was able to click “Embed” and easily embed the “Chris Wininger” message right into my blog post, the very same blog post that talks about how much you suck at life.
But go ahead, listen to the actual audio from the voice mail. It’s just totally not anything like what is presented in the transcription.
One completely normal — and important — voice mail message. Destroyed by Google’s terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad Voice mail transcription service. Imagining how many other completely normal and important voice mail messages are butchered every day makes me want to puke. Before that happens, however, there’s three things I need.
I want to know three things, Google:
- how you plan to fix this
- when you plan to fix this
- who you plan to dispatch to fix this
And, if possible, some background history on that person/team that you dispatch, such as any particular areas of expertise. But the how, when and who is good enough if you don’t have the time.
The world’s eyes are all fixated directly on you, GOOG, like a laser beam. What do you do? What do… you do…?
Excuse me while I puke for all those poor voice mail messages.
